She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
