You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
