oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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