Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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