sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
