you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
