The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
