i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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