His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
