I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
