im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
