How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
