those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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