I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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