I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize