Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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