One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
