She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
