nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
