it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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