You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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