The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize