you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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