Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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