I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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