is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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