Non-Jews are for practice
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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