He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
