Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Randomize