Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
