First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
