It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Randomize
