The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
