You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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