Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize