that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
