she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
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