i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
