I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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