We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
