No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
