Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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