They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
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