well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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