I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I'm sobbing to NWA
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
