physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Randomize
