And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Just high enough for therapy.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
