I must be too annoying 4 u.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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