U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
