Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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