Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
